Note: This post was written just a few days after the earthquake in Nepal that killed over 9,000 people. In the days following the earthquake, I read many comments by Christian friends, attributing the earthquake to God’s punishment of the nation or as an amazing display of his glory or power. I was so angry about it, so I was in a sensitive state when I wrote this review, hence the frustration towards mainline evangelical Christianity bubbling over in the words. This is the topic that sent me spiraling four years ago when my journey to understand faith began, and is still probably the single most triggering topic to me.
Matthew 7:7-11
“Ask and it will be given…” To be honest, I’ve never much liked this verse. I don’t understand it. I feel like I have rarely heard taught was it really means; it’s so often taught with a whole bunch of exceptions. “Ask, and you will give given, but don’t expect God to give you everything you ask for.” I have probably experienced more silence to my prayers than I have received when I asked. But is this what Jesus is talking about here? Is it even talking about prayer at all? Maybe it is about taking the initiative– actively seeking God and working to know him better?
Or maybe it is an even deeper meaning, as seen in the following verses. Perhaps Jesus is trying to say that God isn’t spiteful. He isn’t going around slipping rugs out from under his children’s feet or scaring them with figurative tarantulas instead of teddy bears. He loves and cares for us deeply, like a parent who loves his kids and is trying to do his best. He isn’t going to give us bad things that hurt us, physically or emotionally.
My question has always been, then, why are there bad things? My conclusion while reading this is that the bad things don’t come from God.
Too many Christians– really, mainstream Christianity in general, it seems– has created this abominable, damnable notion that God makes the bad things happen. They don’t always say it like that, but it is the undertone of many things they say. Someone loses a child: “God must be punishing me for something” (or maybe he wants so badly to comfort you?) An earthquake kills thousands of men, women, and children: “It is God’s judgment on them for not turning to him” (or maybe a fault deep under the earth has been building up to this for years?) Money gets stolen: “Everything happen for a reason. Maybe that person needed money and God provided for him–” (or maybe some humans are just evil and steal?)
Instead of recognizing the potential for evil in mankind that causes them to do hurtful things, or in acknowledging the patterns of nature, people always point fingers to God when something bad happens. Sometimes in anger, but even worse, in a sickening state of worship where they repeat over and over, “God is good,” even when someone– they think it is God– has handed them a scorpion or a stone.
This may be the one single most difficult roadblock for me to overcome in holding onto Christianity as my religion. Because around me, every day, Christian people make these stupid comments until the image they have painted of God for me is the big, muscly bully on the middle school playground, beating up the small kids and taking their money, or of a vicious angry deity standing upon the ruins of cities laughing and saying, “It’s for your good, because I love you.”
But I’m not angry at God, because I know that that image is not God. It is not the Father that Jesus showed to us. Passages like this remind me, like a calm breeze, that God is good, and he loves us, and he will give us bread and fish, and if there are stones and snakes, then we know that these cannot be from God.
I am angry at Christians for perpetuating this violent image of a cruel God who is a bully causing heartache, stress, or despair just so people will worship him. I believe God is good, truly good, not just this weird “good” people speak of without even considering the meaning of the word. I will hold to Jesus’ word that his father– Our Father– loves us so much more than we can imagine and that he really does want to give us good things.
Melanie Anderson, Pilgrim 